8-Bit Theater
Episode 038
This caption is about as funny as a burning orphanage
This caption is about as funny as a burning orphanage
Survivor 8-bit Style Part 3
Date Published Monday June 4th, 2001
Previous Comic Episode 037: Survivor 8-bit Style Part 2
Next Comic Episode 039: Survivor 8-bit Style Part 4
Read Episode

Black Mage and White Mage have a race magic row.

Cast Appearing[]



Black Mage OK, fine. We can use my stinkin' hat.
Fighter But I don't want to vote in it if it stinks.
Black Mage scowls at Fighter
Black Mage Anyway, as I was saying, we can use my hat, but you can't see me with it off.
White Mage Why not?
Black Mage Oh, it's a Black Mage thing. You wouldn't get it.
White Mage Oh I see. So you're saying because I'm a white mage, I can't understand the experiences of a black mage.
Black Mage You don't know the kinds of persecution my people have had to endure for centuries! And all because of the color of our spells!
White Mage Well maybe if your spells didn't only have purely evil purposes, you wouldn't have had that problem!
Black Mage Are you saying that black magic and its practitioners are inherently evil?
White Mage Name one positive, non-destructive use for your magic.
Black Mage Ha! That's easy. Give me a scenario.
White Mage OK. An orphanage is on fire. What do you--
Black Mage Use Fire-3 to torch the building and then pick off any survivors with Bolt-2 set to a wide dispersal.
White Mage You are a horrible monster.
Black Mage Stupid kids will never see it comin' either. Suckers!
Fighter At least I got to say a line.
Thief Maybe we'll get to be in the next one.
Red Mage