8-Bit Theater
Episode 058
I totally agree with what BM is reading.
I totally agree with what BM is reading.
Government At Work
Date Published Friday July 20th, 2001
Previous Comic Episode 057: Well What Did You Think He'd Do?
Next Comic Episode 059: Was All That Really Necessary?
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King Steve shows us just how efficient a hunt for prophesied warriors can be.

Cast Appearing[]



And so, in the royal waiting room, our heros uh... waited.
Black Mage is reading EVIL MONTHLY, Red Mage is reading twink monthly, Thief is reading 2600, and Fighter is reading Highlights.
Meanwhile, inside the throne room itself...
King Steve I'm telling you, honey, this light warrior schtick of mine is brilliant. You hear me? Brilliant!
Queen Jane The idea certainly has merit, dear. But how can we be sure they'll be the right light warriors? The prophecy is fairly vague about their identities.
King Steve Waaaaaaay ahead of ya, Honey-Bunch
King Steve See, I figure we'll get a lot of applicants for this gig. Now, it would be a lot of work to shuffle through them al to find the true Light Warriors, right?
Queen Jane Right.
King Steve So why don't we skip the middleman and just send them all? The weak will perish and the chosen ones will rise from the leftovers to save us all.
Queen Jane But doesn't that involve the slaughter of potentially hundreds of lives?
King Steve Ooh, you think the turn out will be that good?
Queen Jane ...I think you're missing the point.
Cut back to the Waiting room. The Light Warriors are still reading. Black Mage thinks to himself (in a cypher language) that he is the most evil character in the comic, and will destroy reality. Red Mage's magazine reads, "3 Steps to Building a More Invincible Player Character." Thief thinks to himself, "Hm... I'll never pay for long-distance again!" Fighter now knows that bees like honey.