| 8-Bit Theater | |
| Episode 100 | |
| |
| "...and that Dragons eat your smelly hat." | |
| White Mage Makes It All Better | |
| Date Published | Wednesday, December 12th, 2001 |
| Previous Comic | Episode 099: A Look into the Private Thoughts of Fighter |
| Next Comic | Episode 101: They Sure Don't Act Like Light Warriors |
| Read Episode | |
White Mage teaches some important lessons to everyone, except Black Mage
Cast Appearing[]
Setting[]
Script[]
| White Mage goes to Red Mage. | |
| White Mage | Red Mage, why don't you just use your own healing magic next time? I won't always be around to save you. |
| Red Mage | But I want to stay at my peak versatility level! |
| White Mage | Think of it like this: which is more versatile? A dead mage or a living mage minus one white spell? |
| Red Mage | Hmm...
I see. You've opened my eyes, White Mage. Thank you. |
| White Mage goes to Thief, whose money bag is stuck in a bush. | |
| White Mage | What's the matter, Thief? |
| Thief | My bag full of gold is stuck in this bush. I can't get it loose. |
| White Mage | Let go of your worldly possessions. They will only slow you down. |
| Thief | That's the craziest thing I ever heard!
And mind you, I've talked to Fighter before, but that's still crazier! |
| White Mage | Thief... |
| Thief | I feel... strangely unburdened. Probably because gold is very heavy and I had quite a lot of it. Y'know, from all the stealing. It's what I do, me being a thief, and all. |
| White Mage | I'm just happy to have helped you see that greed is not the path to peace. |
| Thief | Oh yeah. Definitely. (thinking) I wonder if I could cut off the branch it's stuck on... |
| White Mage goes to Fighter, who is holding a scroll. | |
| White Mage | What'cha got there, Fighter? |
| Fighter | It's the working design for my new brilliant invention: sword-chucks. But I've run into a little problem... |
| White Mage reads the scroll. | |
| White Mage | Hm, I think I understand the over all principle of your design. Perhaps a longer length of chain would make it possible for one to actually wield the weapon without hacking off one's own limbs. |
| Fighter | Perfection! |
| White Mage goes to Black Belt. | |
| White Mage | No one thinks you're gay. And even if you were, it wouldn't matter.. |
| Black Belt | You're right, I have no reason to be so paranoid about what others may or may not think. Besides, love is love. We should let it flourish wherever we can find it. |
| White Mage goes to Black Mage. | |
| Black Mage | Yo. |
| White Mage | You are simply a horrible little monster and I pray for your quick and merciful death. |
| Black Mage | Flirt! |
| Thief manages to get the money bag. | |
| Thief | To the thief go the spoils! |