8-Bit Theater
Episode 1199
Ah, so this is Final Fantasy XII now
Ah, so this is Final Fantasy XII now
Like a Fine Wine
Date Published December 3rd, 2009
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Pain, Pain, Pain…I thought you said you had 31 Flavors of Destruction?

Cast Appearing[]


  • A dark, musty magic shop


Black Mage Spells with which I can bring ruin and pain and a whole lotta fire?
Magic Seller Oh yes, and in a variety of flavors! Apocalypse and Armageddon. And Ragnarok.
Black Mage What's the difference?
Magic Seller Well, Armageddon and Apocalypse are, hmmm, like red wine and white wine.
Magic Seller Both are good, but it's generally preferred to bring Armageddon spells to bear in sort of a more military context. Also, by design they leave a few survivors.
Black Mage What for?!
Magic Seller To build up the next war was always my guess.
Magic Seller Now, a Ragnarok spell, that'll wipe out everything in its range.
Black Mage Okay, I like the sound of that.
Magic Seller The only downside is that they really need three years to be effective.
Black Mage That's hardly ideal.
Magic Seller It is situational to be quite frank.
Black Mage Y'know? I'd better take one of each. Gotta cover my bases.
Magic Seller Oh my! It's a windfall day!
Magic Seller I'll just need to see your Wizard's license.
Black Mage (puzzled look) How's that?