8-Bit Theater
Episode 134
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This Does Not Bode Well For Garland
Date Published Thursday, April 4th, 2002
Previous Comic Episode 133-A: But Not A Very Good Psychic If You Didn't See This Instead.
Next Comic Episode 135: You Almost Feel Sorry For The Poor Guy
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Black Belt finishes pummelling Garland and makes a mess.

Cast Appearing[]



Black Mage Geez, isn't Black Belt done hurting Garland yet?
White Mage Well, you have to say this about him. He's thorough.
Black Mage If you ask me, you can't get more thorough than a dose of Ultima. It's 10 gallons of kickin' ass in a 5 gallon jug.
Fighter Do you know that spell?
Black Mage Well not as such, no.
See, Ultima belongs to the theoretical tenth spell level.
Black Mage But it's a really awesome spell. In theory. See, first you've got to split an atom by focusing your willpower into--
White Mage (interrupting) Here's Black Belt now!
Black Belt enters, his hands and clothes dripping with Garland's blood.
Black Belt I think I got some on me.
Black Belt Kinda sticky
Black Belt shakes his hand vigorously, getting blood on Fighter's armor.
Black Belt See how hard I have to shake to get it off?
Fighter You're getting blood on my armor.
Black Mage (to White Mage) You call me evil, but that guy just beat someone to death with his bare hands...
Fighter Tsk, and you got some in my hair too.
Black Belt (out of frame) Sorry.
Black Mage And you run around the overworld map with him like it was nothing!
Fighter I don't even know where to take armor to get it cleaned.
White Mage It's different when he kills someone. He's a monk.
Black Mage runs over to Black Belt, knocking Fighter over.
Fighter Oof!
Black Mage Tell me, how rigorous is the entrance exam for monk college?
Egg Guy Are you ready for new area? Yeah!
Brian Clevinger Hey, I don't know either. It's filler, just go with it.