| 8-Bit Theater | ||
| Episode 138 | ||
[[Image: |
]] | |
| Yes, Mountain Dew Really Is That Toxic | ||
| Date Published | Friday, April 12th, 2002 | |
| Previous Comic | Episode 137: Quick, Decisive Action! | |
| Next Comic | Episode 139: Back At The Temple Of Fiends | |
| Read Episode | ||
Red Mage and Thief dump the vat of Mountain Dew in the backyard and Black Mage dumps Black Belt in the backyard
Cast Appearing[]
- Thief
- Red Mage Statscowski
- Black Mage Evilwizardington
- Black Belt (the petrified one)
Setting[]
- The Temple of Fiends' Backyard
Script[]
| Now exiting the TEMPLE OF FIENDS. Have a nice day! | |
| Thief | (out of frame) Finally. This damn vat must weigh a ton. |
| Red Mage | (out of frame) Really? I hadn't noticed thanks to a little manipulation of my stats. |
| The next frame shows Red Mage and Thief carrying the vat of Mountain Dew. | |
| Thief | Well anyway, it looks like we found the Backyard of Fiends. This is as good a place as any to dump the Dew. |
| Red Mage | Are you sure that's such a good idea? I mean, what about the ecological ramifications of introducing this filth into the local habitat? |
| Thief | As it so happens, RM I have a theory on that very subject. Care to hear it? |
| Red Mage | By all means, I insist that you elucidate further on this subject. |
| Thief | Well, the way I see it, nature is a delicate balance of biological energy originally derived from the Sun. Introducing mechanical energy into that balance tips the scales. |
| Thief | When that happens, ecological devastation soon follows. |
| Red Mage | That's bad. |
| Thief | but if we do away with the Dew, our contribution to the mechanical rape of the land on a global scale is next to nothing. |
| Red Mage | Thief. I hereby pronounce your theory to be a +5/+5 Theory of Enlightenment. What're we waiting for! |
| Red Mage and Thief pour the contents of the vat onto the ground, which burns the surrounding area. | |
| Thief | (out of frame) Ahhh. Do you smell that? |
| Red Mage | (out of frame) That horrible burning smell? |
| Thief | (out of frame) No, the smell of not having to lug that damn heavy vat of gunk around anymore. |
| Red Mage | (out of frame) Sorry, I can't get past the burning. |
| Thief | Of course, there is a small chance that even our seemingly negligible contribution would be the final straw. |
| In the distance, Black Mage throws the petrified Black Belt into the hole in the ground made by the Dew. | |
| Black Mage | Rot, you miserable bastard! |
| Red Mage and Thief spot Black Mage. | |
| Black Mage | What! |