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8-Bit Theater
Episode 256
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One Backstab After Another
Date Published March 4, 2003
Previous Comic Episode 255: Maximum 8-bit Hexadecimal Value is FF. Coincidence?
Next Comic Episode 257: The Saga of the Crown
Read Episode

Cast Appearing[]

Setting[]

  • Elf Land, Guest Room
  • Elf Land, Royal Room of Royalty

Script[]

Later that afternoon... The Light Warriors, minus one, retire to a guest room at the Castle of Elf...
Red Mage It's hard to believe that Thief has been lying to us about his past all this time.
Black Mage Hard to believe...Have you heard anything that two-faced liar has said since you first met him? I'm still not entirely convinced he is the real prince.
Black Mage Knowing him, he could've set up that pillow thing weeks in advance to discredit that doctor. He's a liar and a cheat.
Fighter I know what you mean, Red Mage. Thief has always been such a forthright and noble leader. I must admit, I am shaken to my core that such an outstanding, morally unchallenged individual could have been lying to us.
Black Mage In the sense that he has no morals with which to be challenged, I guess you almost have a point.
Black Mage He's only on our team in the first place because someone was too stupid to read the contract Thief wrote up.
Fighter Tsk! White Mage should be more careful!
Beat
Black Mage I will laugh for a week straight when I finally kill you.
Meanwhile, in the Royal Room of Royalty..
Astos Blast that Prince Elf. And blast that accursed doctor!
Astos How could I have known that the prince took it upon himself to venture into non-elf lands to seek a fortune to help find a cure for the mysterious illness that had befallen his father? It seems only Dr. Malpractice knew of the prince's intentions. The doctor then faked the prince's illness so I would bribe him to make sure that the prince never recovered so I could take over Elfland with a bloodless coup!
Astos And all the while he was putting the prince's ill-gotten gains into his own bank account! That blasted doctor played us both for fools and made a fortune. Meanwhile, I'm stuck with the rightful heir to the throne a mere two days before I was slated to take over! If only I could dispose of him in some convenient and untraceable manner. Ah, here here comes now...
Thief Excuse me, Chancellor. I didn't mean to interrupt your inner monologue to which I am not privy. I have a question about the Royal Crown of Royalty.
Astos Of course, the crown!