8-Bit Theater
Episode 502
No Image.jpg
Technical Mumbo Jumbo
Date Published Thursday, January 13th, 2005
Previous Comic Episode 501: Talk Like a Pirate
Next Comic Episode 503: An Inside Job
Read Episode

The technical term for sails is discussed, while Black Mage is in disbelief regarding sailing with the Dark Warriors.

Cast Appearing[]


  • Dark Warriors' galleon


Black Mage You can't be serious about going with them.
Thief Why not?
We need to travel around the world and they've got a ship.
I'm just an average forest elf with no real knowledge of sea travel, but I know that's one big boat and it's got a ton of blankets.
Bikke The technical name be "sheets".
Vilbert Prithee, oh captain my captain, but aren't they hitherto "sails".
Switch to Bikke's field sprite and a burning ship.
Bikke Look 'ere, Sonny Jim.
I've sunk more boats than the fabled gnomatic sinking machine what is nuthin' more than a large stone with many smaller stones attached as well as a liberal application of fire.
Bikke I do be thinking I knows what sails be.
Vilbert You mean "sheets".
Bikke Ye mutinous dog.
Garland Gentlemen, gentlemen.
Garland peeks in.
Garland Er, that is, hey, ye guys, keel haul ye argumenting. Um, yar.
Black Mage These are the Dark Warriors.
Tell me you know that. You're the only one I can talk to as something like an equal. Don't take that from me.
Thief Oh, Black Mage. You and your paranoid delusions.
"These are Dark Warriors." "White Mage likes me." "Thief is trying to rob us of our very souls."
Black Mage Wait, I only think that last one out of fear of you. I've never said it out loud.
Thief Oh, I steal souls and secrets.
Black Mage's eyes become tiny out of fear.