| 8-Bit Theater | |
| Episode 580 | |
| |
| Like spontaneous combustion! | |
| Sea Gods Are Pussies | |
| Date Published | Saturday, July 23, 2005 |
| Previous Comic | Episode 579: Little Miracles |
| Next Comic | Episode 581: Of Tricksters and Thieves |
| Read Episode | |
If you're looking for a reliable god, try Chuck Norris. He'll be the answer to your problems!
Cast Appearing[]
Setting[]
Script[]
| Red Mage | So. |
| Red Mage | You're. Y'know. You're wearing, um, rat. |
| Berserker | Oh, indeed. |
| Red Mage | (thinking) Okay, don't panic. Just keep talking and he might not rip your face off with his teeth and pee on what's left... |
| Red Mage | Do that often? |
| Berserker | Only when hunting for Dire Rats. |
| Cleric | I prayed to the Trickster God to fix your friend up. The Blue Book of Divinity doesn't list a single prayer for tricksters, so I had to wing it. |
| Cut to the Blue Book: 12th Edition An Illustrated Guide With Prices for Classic & Collectible Gods | |
| Black Mage | Yeah, it's because they screw you faster than a two dollar whore. And usually with a shiv they convinced you to make. |
| Cleric | Oh, I'm sure you're thinking of some other god. The one I met gave me this healing shiv. |
| Black Mage | Okay. Cleric isn't good with gods. |
| Cleric | (muttering) Which end does the healing... |
| Ranger | Quite the contrary, really. We'd have never made it to this island if not for Cleric's prayers to the Sea Gods. |
| Cleric | Of course, the gods work in mysterious ways. Like a healing shiv. |
| Ranger | For instance, we got here via shipwreck. |
| Cleric | The part that confuses me, though, is that we weren't actually in a ship. |
| Cleric | Or anywhere near an ocean. |
| Cleric | So very mysterious. |