8-Bit Theater
Episode 593
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A three-way tie in the Stupid Race
Date Published Thursday, September 1, 2005
Previous Comic Episode 592: Black Mage is pining.
Next Comic Episode 594: Bad Timing
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Did I already mention how gullible Ranger is?

Cast Appearing[]



Ranger See, the map's key says that one inch is a "jillion" miles. That's a wholly fictional number.
Red Mage That's easily explainable.
Black Mage Are you guys gonna leaf me up here?
Ranger Yes?
Red Mage Oh!
Okay, yeah. Well, y'know.
Red Mage I have a bit of a cold coming on, so I write all my "M"s as "J"s.
Ranger Because of your cold.
Red Mage Yeah. Blasted things.
Ranger What about the "M" here in the word "nightmares"? That's not a "J" at all.
Red Mage Yes, well, not that "M." Clearly.
Ranger Your answers are unusual as always. But you are fellow heroic adventurers and there's no reason to suspect you're lying.
Red Mage That's us! We're heroes and totally not charlatans.
Ranger What an odd thing to say.
Red Mage In fact, I'm pretty sure Black Mage isn't an agent of destruction.
Black Mage (getting off) And if you think using these puns as a stalling tactic until you get into position, then you're barking up the wrong tre--
Ranger I'm not familiar with that phrase.
Red Mage Well?
Black Mage I need to work on my aim?