8-Bit Theater
Episode 609
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Date Published Saturday, October 8, 2005
Previous Comic Episode 608: Teleporting never screws anyone
Next Comic Episode 610: Logic!
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Black Mage feigns having a metaphorical battle from within.

Cast Appearing[]



Black Mage See, the guy you want is someone else. He's a jerk, you'll love killing him.
Oh good, you're sitting now. How pleasant for my eyes.
Greed Hey, I'm a very busy personification of man's struggle with his own greed. I don't have time for this.
Black Mage No, see, Thief is the one you need to talk to.
Greed Look, are you going to have an introspective metaphorical battle with your own base urges, or do I have to eat you?
Black Mage That's... an unusual choice.
Greed I've got to appear to a banker on his death bed in five, so make it quick, will ya?
Black Mage Okay.

Um. Oh, I'm greedy. And, uh, nauseous...? Yeah. What a wasted life. Woe is unto he who is I.
Black Mage Er, my wife, who is completely real, oh, how I guess I've neglected her.
Black Mage I'll just change my ways now. Done!
Greed Well, that sure sounds like an internalized battle against one's own demons.
Black Mage It is. It totally is.
Wait! Wait, I think I... yes, that's a breakthrough whew!
Greed Are you sure? Maybe I should eat you anyway just to be safe.
Black Mage No. No, I'm good. Thanks.
Greed You sure? I've still got a minute.
Black Mage It would be, uh, greedy of me to ask that of you. Go on ahead.