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8-Bit Theater
Episode 915
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Cult Of Stupidity
Date Published Saturday, November 3, 2007
Previous Comic Episode 914: The Truth As He Sees It
Next Comic Episode 916: Getting To Know You
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Well, this explains a lot.

Cast Appearing[]

Setting[]

  • Sky Castle

Script[]

Red Mage All I wanted to do was talk about the tragic story of my lonely life as the last of the Red Mages.
Red Mage I mean, y'know, that's character development right there.
Red Mage I could stop being so one-dimensional I could really live.
Muffin Tragic stories of being the last of an elite order is pretty darn one-dimensional anyway.
Red Mage Well, of course it is, but you get a good XP or kudos bonus for coming up with a backstory.
Mine is a tale that sweeps through all of history!
Muffin Didn't really ask.
Red Mage It begins with the thaumatic genius Red Magus and his mad theory that the universe is governed by numbers.
Red Mage He started a secret society dedicated to the illumination of these numbers and their interactions.
They found most of the rules concerned combat and magic systems.
Red Mage Probably because it'd be a really boring universe without them.
But the knowledge they gained came at a terrible price.
Red Mage The order's numbers were never high.
Probably because they had their sacred meetings on Friday nights when the other mages when clubbing.
Red Mage Membership dwindled with every generation.
Probably because hitting each other with swords and spells to calculate their effects is fatal
And so, I am the last of order of Red Magi!
Muffin Oh, I see. You stupided yourselves into extinction.