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8-Bit Theater
Vacation '04 #3
The Red Mage Memorial Bridge was built with the blood, sweat, tears, and most importantly, corpses of many hard working people.
The Red Mage Memorial Bridge was built with the blood, sweat, tears, and most importantly, corpses of many hard working people.
I Love Bridge Jokes
Date Published Tuesday May 18th, 2004
Previous Comic Vacation '04 no.2 "It won't get weird."
Next Comic Vacation '04 no.4: In A World...
Read Episode

Long bridge joke is long.

Cast Appearing[]

Setting[]

  • A chasm
  • A village near the same chasm

Script[]

Red Mage Hmm, it would appear a massive chasm has interrupted our quest, fellow Light Warriors.
But fear not! As always, have a cunning plan!
Red Mage All I need do is switch my 8 ranks in Knowledge (decorative cake frosting) to 8 ranks in Knowledge (suspension bridge engineering), then draw up a 15-year plan to build the Red Mage Memorial Bridge.
Black Mage Memorial, you say?
Thief You have eight ranks in decorative cake frosting?
Red Mage My personal life is not on trial here!
Black Mage I have a better plan, which is not surprising, as my head would have to implode before I would be capable of devising a worse one.
Black Mage I can't help but notice a peaceful little village right over there.
Black Mage I say we go round up as many townsfolk as we can find and then push them into the chasm, one by one, until their battered corpses form a macabre bridge that we might stroll across at our leisure.
Black Mage is shown walking across the bridge singing "I'm walkin' on sunshine...." if all goes according to his plan.
Fighter Ooo! Can I help??
Black Mage Yes, yes, Fighter. You might say your aid is the foundation of my plan. Heh.
Black Mage And by that, I mean I'm pushing you in first.
Fighter Yay!
Thief Wait, wait, wait. Why do we need to get over this chasm again?
White Mage To slay the great evil! And, uh, for lots of free gil!
Thief Right, killing and looting. But as BM pointed out, there is a village on THIS side of the chasm.
There is a silence. The next panel shows Black Mage, Fighter, and Red Mage destroying the village and killing people as Thief steals.
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